Retirement Toasts & Rhymes
Remembering the accomplishments of anyone no matter how famous or humble is a gift that can last for generations. We have done rhymes for Mohammed Ali, Roy Rogers, and uncle Jim. (you didn't know him but he is quite missed!)
We can document a successful career at a retirement party or give a word of encouragement at a eulogy in a funny or strictly honorable fashion, your call. See below some of the retirements and remembrances that we have done.
Example Retirement Rhymes:
Happy Retirement Jim
You’re pulling the plug – And calling it a day
Shutting off the lights – And literally, just going away
Well Jim, you’ll be missed – By all of your friends
But not by those deadbeats – Whose credit you have to suspend!
Yes, you’ve been a complainer- Quite frankly we’ve heard enough
On the “Eye in the Sky” – Hey, Don’t you think you’ve been a little tough
It’s not that they lie – It’s just that they can’t see
So they guess on tunnel traffic – And when wrong, it’s your agony!
Then there’s the slow bank tellers – I really wouldn’t complain
We’re lucky to have anyone – On this low employment train
Of course we’re in petty cash – When do you think it got its name
It’s a chance to piss and moan – And you’re the best at the game!
Now for all the excuses – Really, you should have been glad
Without all those reprobates – No job would you have had
And the climate control conflicts – That’s a Communist plot
And the hillbilly music – Is not, I repeat, not so much rot!
As for the higher authority credit approves – That was an easy call
Jim, if it was left up to you – There’d be no credit at all
As you walk off into retirement – Remember your doctor’s long drone
“Stick to that diet – Or your wife will be living alone!”
Enjoy all your traveling – But when all is said and done
You’d better stick to the cooler climates – Where there is not so much sun
Drink your Gin Martinis – And attend those Broadway shows
But remember this little tidbit – Which each of us knows!
Though you tried to be grouchy – It really didn’t sell
We’ll remember you as nice – Don’t worry, none of us will tell
Go and enjoy your retirement – You’ve earned it with hard work
A man who gave his all – Who could be counted on not to shirk!
All of us at Camalloy Inc. – Especially Donna, your dear friend
Along with Bill and Frank – Who you thought, tended to over-extend
In case you’re unaware – In this industry you are almost a hero
The guy who loves to issue – A new credit line of ZERO!
Happy Retirement Craven!!
My friend you’re retiring – And hanging around the house
Go out and play some golf – Do it for Vivian, your lovely spouse
Your history is impressive – You started out real fast
You had a talent for details – And your personal knowledge was vast!!
From the U of Texas Law School – You got into the political game
Executive Assistant to Governor Connelly – Pouring coffee was your claim to fame
Then Rainwater gave you the pitch – There was big money to be made
Goldman Sachs was the company – And Houston was the place to be well paid!!
In “69” you started your career in Dallas – Helping to open up Houston several years later
Starting the Craven, Miller, Dawson Partnership – Nothing less than a real fascinator
Restricted stock was the trademark – And you banged on many a door
When the honeymoon was over – Your stocks had a zero score!!
Ferguson, Hoody, Finky, Roberto and Mehos – In the mid 70’s, new kids on the block
Craven’s team joined with Roberto and Mehos – But we were all in for a shock
It became quite apparent – When Roberto lobbed a breast implant bag
And Craven took a swing at him in the office – That Roberto had become a drag!!
Roberto made a name for himself – He was an irritant wherever he went
Dawson once climbed over a desk – Decking Roberto, was his intent
He was always our Craven’s nemesis – Until that fateful night
The Roberto team cleaned their desks – Sneaking out into the moonlight!!
For them it was off to Kidder Peabody – Finally Craven had had enough
He became resident manager – But replacing Coneway would be really tough
But his first decision as manager was easy – Changing Coneways tight fisted ways
No more quarters in a styrofoam cup – The coffee is free, we no longer had to pay!!
The name of this business is networking – And Hypmovation would be the key
Visualizing Coneway working the crowd – Was something we all wanted to see
We’d lie on the floor in our office – Our mantra sincere and true
Knowing the man who made this possible – Was no less than a true Garu!!
But we do have other memories – Like the fateful Chicago flight
Six stops, 9 hours and no food – The travel expense savings must, have been out of sight
We all knew that Big Roy in New York – Was on a cost saving crusade
Let’s face it, a 60 buck savings – And partnership could be made!!
In the old days we had fun in the office – And all are sorry to see you go
Craven, you are a Rennaisance Man – And you’ve helped us all to grow
You’re a history buff and politician – And respected by theTexas Political powers that be
And Scott, you’re one class act – A gentleman for all to see!!
But the one area where you really excel – And set the standard where the bar is high
It’s your role as husband, father and friend – In other words, you’re one hell of a guy
Speaking for all your friends and collegues – Craven, we wish you well
And don’t worry about your legend – Your stories we’ll continue to tell!!
Happy Retirement Rick!!
You’ve worked at Motorola 31 years – So I guess it is okay
That you’ve decided to retire – But for us it’s a sad, sad day
You started at the entry level – Ending as the Senior Officer in charge
Now we’re talking about Finance – Where the responsibility is large!!
Your ethics remained quite high – Though there were times you were stern
Almost always outspoken – You didn’t fight change, being ready to learn
You had an uncanny talent – To evaluate a person’s ability dead-center
And as in my own professional growth – You became a wonderful mentor!!
Oh, you weren’t a push over – Your standards were quite high
And some of the tasks you demanded – Could make a grown man cry
But each of us felt in our hearts – We were better people in the end
Which is why you hold our respect – And we consider you our friend!!
There are regrets to remember – Communication’s Enterprise or Telsim to name two
But the success’s far outweighed them – Being much larger than just a few
You loved the challenge of negotiation – And it’s really where you took charge
Be it acquisition or disposition – Your footprints were very large!!
You love your game of golf – And will now have more time to play
And once you get your numbers down – A new job offer you’ll weigh
For life is full of surprises – And fun is part of the game
Like having a personal toilet – And a private office you can claim!!
“The Bear” became your nickname – Being smart, tough and fair
And it became a company joke – It wasn’t prudent to poke “The Bear”
I personally want to thank you – From the bottom of my heart
As your first female, direct report – I was scared at the start!!
But you took the needed risk – While mentoring and helping me grow
Now as an officer of the company – My gratitude is more than you’ll ever know
So Rick, we want to tell you – And this is from the entire team
We know we’ll see you in the Wall St. Journal – And hope you fulfill your every dream!!
So as you end a stellar career – And destiny opens the next door
Remember your friends at Motorola – Will be hoping you continue to soar
And if ever we can help you – We’re just a phone call away
You have our utmost love and respect – On this your special day!!
Happy Retirement Rick!!
My Mother in Law Muriel Durst
To say you’ve been an inspiration – Is an understatement indeed
You’ve been a wise role model – Truly a rare, rare breed
Raised by your grandparents – In a life some would call hard
You knew the meaning of values – And you were held in high regard!!
Always ready to listen – Offering no opinion unless asked
A cheerful and willing worker – No matter how hard the task
You met the love of your life – And shared your dreams with the Mr.
You and Walter had fun – Raising Phil, and Marcia his older sister!!
You taught your kids good values – To work hard and not complain
There were folks who had less – And experiencing much more pain
You were proud of them both – And they were proud of you
You always put them first – And Marcia and Philip knew!!
Your granddaughter Sara – In your heart had a very special place
And when she came around – It would light up her grandparents face
You and the Mr. had stories – About Sara, you loved to tell
And Sara was a very good girl – That returned that love as well!!
When you lost the Mr. – You truly lost a pal
You two were the perfect team – Walter and his special gal
You’d never lived alone before – But you readjusted your life
Still putting your family first – Muriel, the devoted mother and wife!!
You wanted to stay in your home – And live on familiar ground
And by gosh you did it – Being both, stubborn and profound
Through broken hips and strokes – A cough that wouldn’t go away
No matter how hard it seemed – You got up and began each day!!
We’d look at each other and sigh – How does Mom keep going
You’d smile at us and say – “I’ve got this quilt that I am sewing”
You loved God and your church – Working every Xmas Dinner
Doing the best you could each year – A little shorter and a little thinner!!
You loved your Sons of Norway – Your many friends gave you a ride
You twice waved at the King – A little shy but full of pride
And in your final hours – Knowing you were passing on
You still shared your wisdom – And did till you were gone!!
You told us not to cry – This is something I must go through
You even kept your sense of humor – While giving instructions on what to do
One of the last things you said – And you appreciated them all
“I’ve been so lucky to have good friends – Who would answer my every call!”!
Cathy “Mom” Boesen!!
I first met Cathy and Jim – 1987 was the year
On an FTD trip to Europe – They were nice people, that was quite clear
My wife Honey had served with Jim – But I was new to the game
After meeting Cathy and Jim – My life was never the same!!
When you’re friends with the Boesen’s – Immediately you become part of their family
And when socializing with Boesen’s – Two things are plain to see
Cathy was truly the Matriarch – Her opinion was always sought
And when the decision was rendered – There was never a second thought!!
I remember vividly – All of these florist’s in a London hotel
Most of us suffered with jet-lag – On that the Boesen’s didn’t dwell
The first thing on their minds – Was to head off to attend Mass
Even on vacation in England – They exhibited a lot of class!!
On an air boat to the Florida Keys – The last boat before a storm
Jim was on the upper deck relaxing – While I slept which was the norm
Cathy was praying the rosary – But every half hour she’d say
Marcia, would you check on Jim – As she continued to pray!!
While many wore their tennis shoes – With shorts and a tank top
Cathy was impeccably dressed – Continuing to tour when others would stop
She was very proud of her family – When talking of each her eyes would glow
And that love was also returned – Her kids loved Mom, we all know!!
Petey was her doctor – And better care she never had
Monica and Martha took turns – A tremendous help to Mom and Dad
Claire, Matt and Jim Jr. – Stepped in without missing a beat
It truly was a marvel to witness – Their love for each other was so complete!!
Even at Martha’s wedding – We could see Cathy was losing ground
But if you looked into her eye’s – That Irish fire could still be found
When Brett asked for Martha’s hand – Big Jim had just one thing to say
You’ll have to talk to Mom – But obviously it must have been okay!!
As I think back on the memories – And the many fun times we’ve had
If I was asked to describe Cathy Boesen – These thoughts I would add
Cathy was truly a lady – Prim and proper in every way
And if you were her friend – That my friend was a proud, proud day!!
Our Friend Jim Shaw!!
Jim Shaw was quite a fellow – In life a true success
He worked hard in his grocery business – Straight forward without finesse
As a youngster he got no jump start – His mom was poor with four little boys
Living here and there with relatives – There wasn’t much in the way of toys!!
When he finally got back home – He found himself a job to make ends meet
A little kid with a paper route – Having spending money was bittersweet
Then cleaning floors for the Nite Owls – Many of us here did the same
Not worrying too much about school – Having money to spend, kept us in the game!!
Jim went off to Viet Nam – Answering the call like all the rest
In later years he’d remember – Being fired upon, life’s ultimate test
He told me, “Buddy Boy I was scared” – So scared I froze like ice
Jumping in a ditch with my head down – Not wanting to pay that ultimate price!!
But that’s the way Jim was – Truth was truly his friend
He’d look you in the eye – Good or bad, he wouldn’t pretend
When the group would get together – That class of “63”
The stories would be told and retold – And seldom, would any of us agree!!
When Jim and Kathy melded families – A miracle seemingly took place
Everyone loved each other – Some might call it a moment of “grace”
But the grandkids were most important – Jim loved them one and all
He made them each feel special – Papa left memories that each of them will recall!!
When Jim was told of his lung affliction – No self pity did he show
He jumped right onto the Internet – Doing research so he’d know
The good, the bad and the ugly – Jim kept digging for the truth
Finding others with the same affliction – Making new friends, he became a medical sleuth!!
He knew his days were numbered – But he continued to march on
Working less to spend time with the family – Reconnecting with friends long gone
He attended Army reunions – Time with the grandkids was priority one
Jim would debate anyone on anything – One trait remained constant, Jim was fun!!
When he saw the end was coming – That survival was pretty slim
He thanked his entire family – For loving each other, that was Jim
He wanted to leave with dignity – To Kathy, it was his last request
Loving Jim to the very end – She assured him of his peaceful rest!!
On April 5th Jim departed – Our wonderful friend lost his earthly flame
Our “Sparrow” winged his way to heaven – That was his internet sign-in name
Let’s all remember the good times – And those pork chops with that special spice
Right now I can hear him laughing – “Folks, let me give you some advice”!!